Beyond Inspire

Throughout your life, you’ve noticed a pattern where you’ve felt the need to seem “cool,” whether in school, university, or even as an adult. This need influenced decisions like preferring to be second or third in class instead of first, avoiding being labeled as a “good worker and achiever,” and even choosing not to pursue a master’s degree because it felt “lame” or like trying too hard.

As you’ve reflected on this pattern, you’ve realized that being cool didn’t bring you much in the long term. In fact, it sometimes led you to surround yourself with people who were carefree and didn’t share your goals or values, which might have held you back from achieving your full potential. You also recognized that this need to appear cool sometimes conflicted with your deeper goals, like your desire to be religious.

Steps to Embrace Your Authentic Self

1. Reframe “Cool”: Redefine what being cool means to you. Instead of associating it with external validation or social status, consider traits like authenticity, humility, and staying true to your values as the new cool.
2. Focus on Your Spiritual Goals: Your goal is to be religious, and by prioritizing your faith, you can naturally let go of the desire to seem cool. Focus on inner peace, spiritual fulfillment, and connecting with like-minded individuals who support your religious journey.
3. Acknowledge the Escape: Recognize that seeking out carefree friends may have been a way to escape stress or pressure. It’s okay to need an escape, but it’s important to balance this with relationships and activities that align with your deeper values and goals.
4. Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself as you work through these patterns. It’s natural to have these tendencies, but with awareness and reflection, you can gradually shift toward a more authentic and fulfilling path.
5. Reflect on Your Long-Term Fulfillment: Focus on what will bring you lasting satisfaction. The temporary gratification of appearing cool often pales in comparison to the deep fulfillment that comes from living in alignment with your values and goals.

Identifying and Addressing Other Patterns

We also discussed common patterns that people often experience, such as procrastination, perfectionism, people-pleasing, and overthinking. Recognizing these patterns in yourself can help you address them and make changes that better support your personal and spiritual growth.

As you continue on your journey, keep reflecting on your actions and decisions, and consider how they align with your true self and goals. By doing so, you can continue to grow and become the person you truly want to be, free from the pressure to conform to external standards.